On the 29th night of December in 2021, my brother gave me the news of our father’s passing. He began with the words, “Dad had an accident, he’s in the hospital…” I looked into his eyes, his tone echoing in my mind; in that moment, I realized our father had gone forever.

We had experienced the loss of loved ones several years ago, but the loss of my “father” hits different. We both plunged into different yet equally dark worlds. Whole year was spent in this unfamiliar realm. The first six to seven months passed in absolute darkness. I stood in my place, listening and feeling in this void, unable to see a thing. There was no light. After this period, faint points of light, like stars in a desert, gradually began to shine. I moved and observed alone. I felt. Boundless pain of grief, loss, the agony of becoming nothing, and the hardship of rebuilding from the very first particle of existence, the terrifying yet beautiful and impactful face of death, the glory of nature even in the smallest details, and the unique interplay and dance of life and death together.

I deeply observed, felt, and lived their lives. A year after my father’s death, I wasn’t the same person who had been swept away by the greatest fear of my life, losing my father. In Murakami’s words: “After coming out of the heart of the storm, you are no longer the one who stepped into the heart of the storm.” And I, I was born again.

This collection is the result of passing through and experiencing the greatest fear of my life. The paintings in this collection explain the being, becoming, and transformation on my journey throughout this year.

This experience, the story of the path I traveled, I couldn’t describe it in words. Only through art; the combination of colors, shapes, and images allowed me to recall this deepest and most impactful experience of life to the outside world.